Skin care

My skin has it's bad days, but it's not terrible.

My philosophy of good skin:
1. Work out - circulation and health body = great skin
2. Drink lots of water - hydration = great skin
3. Try to stick with the skin products that work for you than trying out so many different types of lotions, toners, serums...etc.  I actually prefer French brands over Japanese and Korean (whisper: I use Lancome for pretty much everything, including make up)
4. Don't use foundation.  honestly, I think a woman's natural skin and tone is the most beautiful--instead of just covering your whole face up with a totally different shade.  utilize concealer instead!
5. SPF
6. Good sleep (I found that 8 hours of sleep makes my skin feel more tight and glowing) AND sleeping at regular times.  Yes, sounds old lady-ish, but sleeping and waking up at consistent times helps so much.  My mom swears that sleeping through 10pm-2am is the best for the skin because of some kind of circadian rhythm and cell renewal times, but it's too tough for me to do that.
7. As soon as you get home, wipe off make up
8. Don't think about skin too much -- just develop a routine and don't focus too much on the blemishes or pimples.  I felt like my bad pimples never went away when I put too much attention to them.
9. Change pillow covers regularly (at least biweekly!)
10. No conditioners if you can.  I know everyone's hair temperaments are different, but ever since I stopped using conditioners (middle school), my hair was still fine and soft, and my skin had less breakouts.

I'm still on the fence with eye cream.  I read articles that your facial moisturizer does just as good enough job...

EXTRA.
My mom has skin like tofu.  She has the softest skin ever.  She told me to use body lotion, so I bought an avocado body lotion and the scent reminds me of Korea.  Let's see how long this will last.  (The other time, I bought a big bottle of Johnson and Johnson's baby lotion and that didn't last more than a week...maybe because the bottle didn't have a pump, so the convenience of using it was more cumbersome).  This new lotion has a pump.  I LOVE PUMPS!!!

thank God for candles

my husband lights them after he destroys the bathroom.

WOO.

A conversation at 9:34 PM

"Honey."

"Yeah, honey."

"Today is December 4th."

"Okay."

"And we already spent 369.23 dollars this month."

"...on what?"

"Mainly groceries."

"Oh."

"Just letting you know."

"Okay."

Goals so far for the next year

1. Finish Ramit Sethi's book and start investing
2. Visit an international country
3. Learn HTML - I talked with a friend from my high school is doing an amazing job with her web designs (all self taught).  I remember she was super smiley, super smart and wore bright colors that worked surprisingly well together.  Check out her some of her work: http://100daysoffonts.com/ . I want to see what I can do as well haha.  I wanted to know how she was doing aside from work, but she was tired from doing working in the studio that day and didn't want to bother her!
4. Finish children's book #1
5. Draw a picture everyday - even if its a sloppy doodle.
6. Be more financially savvy.
7. Work out more often.

TESTING OUT HTML

Posted by: Sandra Lee Juhn

My husband mutters to himself a lot. I find him talking to himself in the bathroom and he talks quite a lot in his sleep. The other day he was laughing in his dream, there was another occasion when he was talking about a love hotel. His favorite thing to do in the shower is sing Phantom of the opera
SING TO ME, MY ANGEL! It is because I lived by myself for 31 years. - the husband added.

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 DAMMIT. I SUCK.

confusion

i get scallions and shallots mixed up all the time.

Budgeting

My newfound hobby: Budgeting

At first I dreaded it.  There was just too much to account for, especially with two people with multiple bank accounts and credit cards.  But, since high school, I was so curious to know how and where my money went in, out or stayed.  I didn't want any mere estimates or generalizations -- I wanted to know where each penny was going, to the T.

These were my attempts in the past
- In high school, I carried around a notepad and tried writing down the spendings on a notebook and punch them into a calculator.  I even would carefully select and purchase a cute Korean money spending tracker notepad.  That seemed to help a bit, but all I can tell you was that the record keeping didn't last more than a month.
- In college, I used Minted.  But some of the spendings would be placed in the wrong categories causing me to spend more time editing and carefully looking through if things were categorized correctly.  That lasted longer, but not much--maybe two, three months?
- This past year, I tried YNTB, but it was just basically an excel sheet with a few fancy buttons.  It was an application that I definitely could have done myself with a computer excel sheet.  Thus, waste of subscription money.

So, I took it into my very own hands since this past January and started with the technological basics: the excel sheet.  It was just me, my laptop, excel, simple formulas and perusing of hundreds of bank statements.  It was difficult to face the numbers for a long while because we had to fly to California so often and Alex was the breadwinner on a resident salary (I was waiting for my optometric license to get in)--all I could tell you was that we were in the red for a long long time.  Once I got the grasp of how much we were making together and how much we were spending, I found myself writing furiously in notebooks and extrapolating figures during my work breaks, then updating it onto my laptop as soon as I came home.  I was checking out finance books from the library and reading about them online.  I'll admit, I was late in the growing-up game with this whole finance thing, but everything was finally making sense.  Also, I remember thinking to myself, 'Man, I used to be one of those kids who used to scoff at the boring adults reading through dense boring money books, and here I am, at 29 years old, hungrily going through personal finance articles.'

Now, I absolutely LOVE punching in the numbers, extrapolating, and determining out how much we spend on what, how much we can save, where we can save, what goes into taxes, how much is needed to buy a car, house and much much more! I would put in every single spending (name, date, category, cost) and color code them, pie chart and compare each month.  I even calculated how much I spend on skin care and make up every year (less than $700) and graphed the utility bills to see how much electricity or water bill goes up per season.

In the end, it led me and Alex to proudly pay off all the student loans last week!

Weeeee!  I can't wait for the new year :)

Happy One Year Anniversary and Baptism!

Holy moly, I've been married for a whole year!  I can't believe that we hit the one year mark.  Let alone, I still can't believe I am married!  Every month or so, I would tell Alex, "Honey, I can't believe I am married."  And he would look at me, slightly offended and confused, because he believes it and it's very real to him.  But, I can't help it--I just can't believe it sometimes!

It was truly a difficult year, especially for Alex--first year residency, adjusting to each other, moving (twice!), figuring out how to make a home, waiting for jobs, juggling in between jobs, flying back and forth cross-country multiple times, and losing a very precious loved one.  But we made it and I am so incredibly proud of us: finished first year residency, started working at Wills Eye hospital, found a church that we love and are committed to, and finished paying off student loans.

It definitely smoothed out and felt more stable within the past two, three months.  God has been sovereign and good, and time and time again, I am reminded that His plans are much greater than our own.  And I love that.

Year One - Nov 19, 2017

HAHA BTW THIS IS TRUTH!  My sister sent this to me after I told her about being frustrated about Alex taking the dinner leftovers ALL THE FREAKIN TIME.  I would work so hard on the meals, then he would take it for his own lunch the next day and he would innocently tell me, "Honey, we shouldn't eat out as much and pack our own lunches to save money."  WHAT DO YOU EXPECT ME TO EAT THEN, HMMM?? HMMMMMMM??????  I tried to pick a fight with him about it, but he gently diffused the situation by saying that he would pack PBJs and that we can save the leftovers for the next dinner.  *sigh* Thanks honey <3 . I love you, Alex.  Life is so much warmer with you.

Also on this day, I finally got baptized again.  I wanted to since the 9th grade.  I know it's not an excuse, but there were so many moving pieces and big life events in between that time.  But I am so happy to be baptized and declare my Christian faith to the public that Jesus is my Lord and Savior.  Amen, amen, amen!

Latest obsessions

1. swimsuits from "everything but water" - they are so pretty and cute, just makes me want to take a holiday by a warm beach in Hawaii
2. house plants - i love the ones that look painted like calatheas :)
3. leather bags - still trying to find a more affordable amazing quality bags, but my ultimate favorite will always be celine.  lately my eyes have been on building block and marni.  i still have aspirations of designing my own...
4. handmade ceramics - dying to take a ceramics class - earthy and natural <3

timeless obsessions:
1. coats - i love a good a-line coat
2. hats - just bought a fall hat a few weeks back :) on the hunt for summer hats that are on sale now
3. installations
4. summers

------------------------------

do i dare to...
1. purchase an "over the knee boots"?
2. make my own clothes?  learn to sew?  just because i have a thought of how i want my clothes to look like, doesn't mean i can make it well :(
3. get a wacom to doodle with computer media?

it seems like i still have a good amount of aspirations ! let's not throw away our dreams now !

i have no desire to have children at the moment, it scares me... am i too focused on myself?  am i too selfish?

Why is it that

at a time, when I have the least amount of money saved up, I want to spend the most?

Why is Mansur Gavriel's ocean bag so dang cute?

Like my sister asked, "What do you put in there??"

I don't know.  Keys. A mere wallet. A wavy wig.

Resuscitate!

So much has been going on.  Will try to blog and post pictures more often so that I have a record of my silly thoughts and feelings.

1. We moved!  Oh, I already told you this.  Life is so much better here.

2. Came back from California with a heavy heart.  There definitely has been mountains to climb, as Alex's mother had been battling pancreatic cancer for so long.  Will update on a different post.  This experience has changed perceptions and reminded me of how precious each, even ordinary, day is.

3.  I started working for Wills Eye Hospital.  I can't believe it.  Me, out of all people.  ME!

4. I have so many projects I would like to start.  I have already become more settled in the new place (still need to organize and file things) and am ready to use my spare time to work on projects I have always wanted to do with the support of Alex.  

5.  Last winter was the worst winter of my life.  So incredibly difficult that stretched me in all directions.  I am determined to conquer this one.  Fall here is beautiful.  I honestly have no qualms with Philadelphia after we moved to the burbs.

I leave you with this.  I love Korean commercials.  They are just so dang good.  Clean, wonderful lighting, humor and all that jazz.

"난! 엄마는 왜계인!"

*buaaaaaahhhhh*

Working part time

100k

not bad, Sandra, not bad.

Updates as a list (as simple as I can make it)

1. moved to the suburbs - I LOVE LOVE LOVE having an in unit laundry, dish washer, garbage disposal, trash chute, and a mini walk-in closet.  gosh, you have no idea how much i love this place.  i love that we can walk around the area that is lush with green and by the river.  i love that it's nearby a main street.  i love the way the light hits our rooms.  i love how parking is included with the rent.  i love this place!  i was getting so sentimental when we moved out the place from rittenhouse, but FORGET ABOUT THAT DUMP!  THIS PLACE IS AMAZING!!!  i love you, marble bar table.  i love you, our bright wooden floor (it's not real wood).  i love you, next door neighbor cicadas--i welcome your shrill mating calls!  i love you, handicap leveled cabinets...i love you i love you i love you!

2. i am into cake baking/decorating lately.  i know, baking was such a challenge for me, but now i can do it somewhat decently!

3. i got accepted to work at WILLS EYE HOSPITAL!!!!!!!!  i thought i was the type who wanted something just cushy and low stress, but since i don't have kids and time on my hands, i wanted to push myself.  i am incredibly excited, honored and scared at the same time.  working at private practices make you forget so many things.  time to get cracking and learn with my husband

4. i love listening to french cafe music--check out "world music ensemble - french cafe" . quite pleasant :)

5. i live 5 minutes away from my dear college friend, helen, and 10 minutes way from my dear elementary school friend, grace! 

Patients today

Most days work doesnt feel like work.  All the loneliness and frustrations I had been feeling for the past 6 months seem to subside when I get to talk to my patients.  I love asking them what they do, their philosophies on certain aspects of life (marriage, children). Today's highlights thus far:

1. A very chubby and jolly 30 something year old middle eastern husband with a thick accent with a gray baby holder strapped across his large belly was so excited to get his eyes refracted.  He came in with his beautiful and serene wife with a very chubby, healthy (loud) 11 month old daughter on her lap.  When I told him he didn't need glasses and he saw very well, he frowned.  He looked straight at me with his dilated eyes and asked me, "What is your dream?"
"Excuse me?"
"Yourrr drrrream (with his r's intensively rolling)!"
"My dream?"  It was such a random question for a patient to ask me.
"I tell you my drrream doctorrr, my drrream is to wearrr glasses because I look verrrry handsome in them," he said in all seriousness.
I looked at his wife and she was nodding and smiling in agreement.  I laughed and told him that many dream to have his perfect vision (he grunted in disagreement) and he didn't have to worry because his dream would come true once he hit age 40.  His eyes grew as big as doughnuts, his mouth opened, and he exclaimed excitedly as he took his mini-me into his arms "40 will be soon!" And he waltzed out the door.  This was my first patient to have wanted presbyopia to happen.  I think he may be my one and only ever.

2.  A new patient, a pudgy boy in high school came in for a glasses and contact lens for the first time.  He was very calm and quiet.  He told me he broke and lost his glasses from playing basketball, he also stated he never saw well out of his left eye (oh great, is this another amblyopia??).  He had high astigmatism and high myopia (which kind of irks me because there are never any trial lenses with his power).  After refracting him, he could only see the 20/30 line with either eye...should I just have him wear glasses for time being and then have him come in later for contacts?  I doubt his parameters are in the trial set.  I slowly started to say, "You will need to get used to glasses first because you have such high astigmatism, I am not sure if you will be used to them in the first place...I may need you to come back after wearing glasses for a while, then do contacts afterward..."
He nodded,"Okay, I will do that.  I understand."
Uugghhh but Sandra, you know you should just do it...he was totally looking forward to contact lenses.  Just try!
"...but let's just try the contacts now, might as well!"  I was groaning as I was selecting the adjusted parameters.
Then we started talking about basketball and he was telling me how his favorite player was Kyrie Irving and how watching the finals wasn't so fun because he liked LeBron.  I started inserting the right contact lenses and as soon as it settled, he had the biggest smile ever.  "I haven't seen this good since the 4th grade!"
I was thinking to myself, it should be worse vision than the glasses...I put on the other one and he his smile grew even bigger (didn't even know that it could be possible).  'What is he seeing??' I thought to myself.
I check his vision: 20/20 on BOTH eyes.  I was immensely relieved and surprised.  Then I started saying some dumb shit like "Omigod!  I am the Kyrie Irving of contact lenses!  Man, I am good!  I am SO GOOD!"
Then patient was laughing, agreeing, and feeding my big head "The Kobe!  The LeBron!"

Asteroid Hyalosis

finally saw one in a long while.

definitely put a smile on my face because I find asteroid hyalosis to be so cute and magical!  Little gold scintillating evenly scattered in gelly matter without affecting the patients vision

not long enough

my hairs were not long enough for waxing.  that or the sally hansen wax totally sucks.

did i mention the smell of the wax?  the fumes have got to be toxic.  do not use sally hansen wax. yuck.

random

this is the first time my husband and i have been apart from each other for more than three days!  he is in california taking care of his mom and i am in pennsylvania taking care of work (luckily work was kind enough to give me another two weeks off to spend time with family).

1. first night i was here, i missed my husband terribly and cried a bit.  but now i am a-okay!  maybe because i know ill be home in a few days :)

2. i think i like hitting balls with sticks...as in...batting cage, yes.  golfing, yes.  pool, yes.  tennis, no--racquet does not equal stick.  i probably would like cricket.  a round pinata? very likely.

3. its nice not needing to shave my armpits and leg hair for the time being.  ive been wanting to wax for so long, but being with my husband all the time made me shy with growing out gross hair to wax (blahblahblah feminists telling that i should just grow it out, LADY, it is just personal preference!!  nothing to do with feminism or social norm.  i just like being smooth, geez).  just bought sally hansen's stripless hard wax kit - #1 selling wax brand in the U.S.A. according to the box.  sold.  never tried it, but let's give it a go...tomorrow.

4. wait, i need to pluck my moustache, too *wince* tomorrow...

5. man, if i lived by myself, my house would be a pigpen.  oh dangit, i forgot to do laundry again...tomorrow.

6. i have been self-employed for past year, and i finally started working at a place that auto-deducts tax, and DANG.  GOVERNMENT BE TAKIN ALL MY MONEY.  it's like 35% of my hard earned money is GONE.  DONALD, IF YOU ARE GONNA DO THAT STUPID TAX REDUCTION THING, DO IT RIGHT.  IF NOT THEN PUT OBAMA CARE BACK ON  GEEZ, YOU DUMB PIECE OF SHmuuccckkkk...

7. i finally got my period!  i was so worried i was pregnant because i was drinking wine!!!!  thank god, gonna go on prenatals, just in case...TMI?  sorry, nobody really reads my blog anyway :) . i was reading an article today saying that age 34 is prime time to have your first kid because you are likely socially and psychologically stable, physically healthy enough, and thus gives a better mortality and likelihood of success for the baby, but 35 is the age to stop having your kid....so uh, hopefully you can have triplets on your first try.  it was a very interesting article on huffington post, and it made me feel better about putting off having a kid for the next couple of years.  although i did stumble upon my friend's post how she was struggling with infertility for two years and just got pregnant--it was emotional and made me think of what it would be like to have my own babies.  and it got me all teary eyed and wanting one...a boy first, then a girl :)

8. i eat pretty well by myself.  pepperridge farm cookies for breakfast, yogurt and welch fruit snacks (i love the grape!!!) for lunch. a whole head of lettuce wrapped around small pieces of spam or quesadilla....okay maybe not...but better than pizza every night, right?

9. song i like these days: Thunder by Imagine Dragons

10. God make me closer to you....

Go!

In about 1 week...

...My husband and I will have been married for 5 months.
...I have been not working for the past 6 months.

I am embarrassed that so few things were accomplished during that time.  It was a terrible waiting game primarily due to the optometric license.  It was difficult to make solid plans because interviews could be scheduled at any time and I was so eager to find a job.  Plausible work dates were being made, but license may or may not be in by that time.  It was and still is a frustrating time (yes, I am still waiting for my license).

I was so dry, bitter and gave into sin many many times.

I would turn to my parents and friends for immediate comfort.  I was glued to social media because it was a way for me to get in touch with people and see how they were doing, instead of me messaging them all the time.  I did not turn to God and refused to open up the Bible.  I wanted a quick "tangible" fix, I liked that they understood me.

But all their words and comforts would be a very temporary band-aid and I would be back to my upset self.  I thought venting to them or having some kind of human interaction would help decrease my negative feelings and anger, but I realized I felt more justified with the way I felt and blow up at my husband.  I wanted to blame him that I was in this state because of him.  I was unsatisfied with pretty much everything and would make him feel my misery.

My husband was being sucked dry to the bone -- exhausted from resident life, being on call, studying, and rubbing shoulders with acrimonious people.  On top of that, he was constantly worrying about his mom, bravely battling the difficult pancreatic cancer on the other side of states.  On top of that, he would come home and tend to his wife who had unpredictable emotions stemming from feelings of loneliness, uselessness, and intense dark anger.

But during his MOST difficult time in life, he was still trying to love me.  Yes, there were times when my husband fought back.  But all in all, he would be the first to comfort me, understand me, affirm me, and love me.  I could not understand where he was coming from.  How can he love me when he is stuck with, literally, the worst and ugliest person he has probably ever met?

Today, I came across a stranger's picture.  She looked so lovely holding her daughter and it seemed like she was getting ready for her sister's wedding.  I know it sounds stalker-ish, but I had a strange feeling because I felt so drawn to and connected her.  I was surprised that she was also married to an ophthalmologist who was the same age as Alex and went through a similar track as him--took some time off after college, went to medical school, took a year off during medical school to do ophthalmology research, and then got matched to ophthalmology.  They had dated longer (seemed like 3 years) and were married for 3 years longer (oh gosh, okay yes, I am definitely a stalker).  That meant she probably went through similar things as me: where her husband was too busy and exhausted at times, and she would move around for him and look for jobs.  She, too, was educated (much more educated and accomplished than me) and had a professional degree under her belt.

However, the stark difference between her and me was how the situation was handled.  She tenderly and faithfully relied on God from the beginning.  Just her whole attitude and aura, was graceful, encouraging, and lovely--constant through all those years.  There was no bitterness, just endless love and opportunity.  Suddenly, I had a pang of desire to have a heart like hers.

So I pulled out my Bible and did my first personal quiet time this year in a long time.

petty little stressors

1. Buying bedsheets, bedlinen, duvet - it's a whole new world for me.  what is this linen count?  i know that more linen count = warmer, but how much warmer? what cover is considered good quality? how do i know if this huge sheet will make our room look better or cozier or worse?  i need an interior designer.  i want to purchase a nice duvet for our comforter, but i have NO idea what the size is...i am just going to assume that it is a king sized comforter..........................MUST USE THIS OPPORTUNITY OF 50% OFF SALE FROM MACYS OR ELSE I WILL HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER TWO MONTHS FOR AN UPCOMING SALE, JUST BUY.

2. Buy dinnerware - omigoodness, where to start?  i just want something simple and white, but why are there so many different kinds???  i have to start thinking if the shape will be ergonomic when washing dishes (like little studs on the plate will have food stuck on it more easily).  my mom says "pick the one that will make the food look tasty" - but it's hard to tell when you have a white circle dish vs. a white circle dish with a mild bordering bump...do borders around dishes make it look tastier?  what about the one with butterflies and bugs on it?  how is that supposed to make a dish look tastier?  prettier maybe...tastier?  i would be distracted i think...am i going in the right direction with deciding which dish design to get?  GUHHH TOO MANY CHOICES.  LORD, I NEED THE GIFT OF HOMEMAKING DISCERNMENT.

3. Deciding what to make for dinner - cooking aint no problem for me, in fact, i enjoy it.  the least favorite part of my day is dishwashing.  don't get me wrong, my husband does a lot of dishwashing for me, but it is crunch time for him and i feel like it would be nice if i did it instead so he would have the 15 minutes to resting or studying.  but anyway, deciding what to make for dinner or for my husband's lunch is not an easy task.  so many factors come in: what do we have in the refrigerator, should we eat this again?  should i learn something new?  do i have the ingredients?  do i walk to trader joes and save money?  or do i walk to rittenhouse market and save time?  is there enough protein in today's meal or vegetables?  if i try something new, will it taste good?  BLAH!

4. Money when grocery shopping - okay, i admit, i used to be one of those people who NEVER looked at price tags or compared prices.  if i wanted something, i would just get it and enjoy it.  i remember my friends from optometry school, whenever we carpooled to get groceries together, they would have this horrified look on their faces when i would just throw things in the cart and not know the prices.  nowadays, i am comparing prices of canned chilis.  why is it so much more expensive at this marketplace vs. the other grocery store, but the price on steak is the other way around?

5. Deciding to go outside - wash my face, brush my teeth, apply make up, get ready.  i need to work out. i should get fresh air. i can discover something new.  vs. it is so damn cold outside and it is so warm at home.................HOME IT IS.

6. I get so easily distracted nowadays.  Here is a typical day:
   I need to study (starts studying)
   but it would be so nice if I could study in comfy clothes (looks through drawers)
   Hmm...looks like I need to do laundry (takes out laundry towards the kitchen)
   Ooo, I need to do the dishes (starts doing dishes)
   Oh but I need to prep for dinner (stops dishwashing and looks through refrigerator)
   Yumm, this yogurt is so good (starts eating yogurt)
   I wonder what is on tv while I finish this yogurt (turns on console and watches a drama for 10 minutes)
   Ooo the actress has such nice skin, I should work out (goes back into room and looks up workout classes)
    I wonder where this gym is at (proceed to look at GoogleMaps)
    Man, i feel like traveling, how far is Iceland from here (.....THIS GOES ON FOREVER).
THEN I REALIZE I HAVEN'T DONE $HIT until my husband calls me and tells me he is on his way home.  TIME TO MAKE DINNER!  (ooo but the laundry is out here, I should do laundry...)
YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT.

welcome to the petty realm of sandra's mind

FOREVER LEARNING!

Felt quite productive today and decided to try a new recipe: dduk gook, rice cake soup (usually served during lunar new years)  Why?  Because my husband likes soupy things and I was craving something dumplingy.  I am so good at describing things.

I was excited to make it and the progress was going well -- the soup was tasty, made the broth myself (anchovies, dried dashi, beef brisket and shiitake mushrooms), roasted the seaweed, made perfect diagonal green onion slices and Korean decorative yellow egg slivers.  Except I forgot that once you add rice cakes, you need to consume right after or else it will get super soggy.

Husband comes home in about 2 hours and I have already added in the rice cakes...I hope he likes porridge...

:'(

Anais Nin

one of my favorite writers and poets of all time :)

i thought this was amusing (backstory, she was married to mr. guiler on the east coast but fell in love with mr. pole and got "married" to him in the west coast):

[Anaïs] would set up these elaborate façades in Los Angeles and in New York, but it became so complicated that she had to create something she called the lie box. She had this absolutely enormous purse and in the purse she had two sets of checkbooks. One said Anaïs Guiler for New York and another said Anaïs Pole for Los Angeles. She had prescription bottles from California doctors and New York doctors with the two different names. And she had a collection of file cards. And she said, "I tell so many lies I have to write them down and keep them in the lie box so I can keep them straight.

how bold of her

Day 64 of no work - Petty Thoughts

1.  Every.single.darn.time I pass by a jar or bagful of pre-peeled garlic, a mini thought battle goes on.  We go through about 5 bulbs a week.
     - This would save me so much time...
     - But you have a lot of time on your hands
     - My fingers won't hurt as much if it is peeled already for me!
     - True, but garlic tastes better straight from the bulb
     - Po-tay-to, po-tah-to, my husband won't notice a difference, besides my hands smell after peeling garlic...
     Somehow the fresh garlic always wins.

2. I love cutting the following:
    - green onions: the fat fresh ones just chop so cleanly
    - kimchi: satisfying bite sized pieces
    - my hair: I feel like a brand new person!

3. The following, not so much:
    - mincing garlic: literally flies everywhere.  is it my mincing technique that sucks or is the knife not of good quality or garlic giving it's last fling before it's ultimately sacrificed for dinner?
    - onions: there is not enough space in the kitchen to do it by the running water.  tears...tears everywhere.
    - my hair: I quickly realize that it is the same haircut I have been having for the past ten plus years.  Guhhh... I really want to try something new and becoming :(
    - lint on my pants: they are the kinds that the sticky tape cant pull off, you literally have the shave off the lint with a razor.  is it my fault that it gets linty or the pants of poor quality?

4. Still waiting for my Pennsylvania license to come in.  During my free time how come I don't maximize it?  How come I would rather fill it with working?  Is it because I have nothing else I want to accomplish?  Nonono... Sandra dig deep!  Excavate and do everything you wanted to do that you have tucked away in a dusty stale place.  Come on!  Let the light shine upon it permanently.

5.  I love listening to different versions of Moon River.  Particularly the jazz and ukulele versions :)


Not so petty thought:

Believe it or not, I had a fat mourning period.  It literally lasted a solid month as soon as I moved to Philadelphia to be with my husband.  I thought it would be easy to move and start a life with the man I love in a city I have lived in before, but I (actually, we both) definitely underestimated it.  It was perhaps one of the most emotionally tumultuous experience I had ever gone through (probably for my poor husband, too).  I felt incredibly unhappy, insecure, and empty for a multitude of reasons.  I did not want to do anything, I was so dissatisfied with where and who I was.  Finally after about one very very difficult month, I am slowly coming out of the hole thanks to daily prayer and quiet time with my husband.