The unexpected as come, yet again.

I am kind of getting the hang out how life throws in unexpected turns: from abruptly moving to Korea, a scarring relationship at 15, winding up at a liberal arts college in the east instead of a university in California, having optometry as a career when I thought I'd be a designer and going through CRVO as an eye doctor.

I firmly say: all of these experiences have turned out for the better, so I am not as afraid of future curve balls.  I have also realized the only consistent, reliable and expected aspects in my life are my family's and God's love--through and through.

Things that have been bouncing around HARD in my head lately:
1. I wanted to do more for my parents.  I wanted to send them on a nice relaxing trip.  I wanted to treat them better.  I wanted to provide for them.  Is this the kind of love God desires from His people?
2. Am I ready to die to myself everyday?  I see that am still immature when I think about how there are so many things I want to have and to do.
3. How can I be sure my sister is going along the right path?  I suppose prayer...I wanted more time to spend with her.  I can say that my mom and my sister truly are my best friends.
4.  My parents are so incredibly forgiving and the nicest, most understanding pair.  It still amazes me to a point where it angers me how much they will bend for the sake of the situation, for the sake of peace, for the sake of love, for the sake of the future.  Their pride, they lay down...every damn time.  They exemplify God's love.
5. I always knew I had a knack for friends--they are always the most supportive, gifted, and beyond wonderful.  During this time, they have built me up and shown that they have my back.  At a drop of a hat, they come to my childish needs and give me sound advice.  I am deeply thankful for these friendships and feel like I am one of the luckiest people in the world.
6. I've been tearing up randomly at work and driving whenever I think about leaving my family and not have done enough.  I just finished graduate school, settled in work life and began to enjoy freedom.  There is no way I am going to have a kid soon!

...I need to go work out.